Dr. Gary Chapman is as a pastor, speaker, and author. He speaks extensively throughout the U.S. and internationally on marriage, family, and relationships. He is the author of “The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts“. You can download a free pdf of his book here.
Click on this link to do a free The Five Love Languages Quiz to find out which is your dominant love language.
How to speak your partner’s love language
The 5 love languages is based on the idea that people rarely are in a relationship with someone who “speaks” the same “love language” as they do. This means that often we express our love to our partner in our own language. Because they speak a different language they don’t “get” that we’re expressing our love to them. And because our partner doesn’t speak our love language, we often feel unloved by them. So, after the initial high-energy attraction stage, each partner begins to feel emptier and emptier in the relationship.
The five love languages are:
1. Words of Affirmation (Talk) – This language uses words to affirm and appreciate other people.
2. Acts of Service (Tasks) – For these people, actions speak louder than words.
3. Receiving Gifts (Tokens) – For some people, what makes them feel most loved is to receive a gift.
4. Quality Time (Time) – This language is all about giving the other person your undivided attention.
5. Physical Touch (Touch) – To this person, nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate touch.